I miss being little!

So, can we talk about how dumb I was as a kid?

I was watching my old Disney movies today and noticed sooo many things I never noticed before. Like the fact that the voice of Aladdin was Steve from Full House! Steve even dressed up as Aladdin in the episode when they went to Disney World. I think I even thought, wow, he sounds a lot like the real Aladdin every time I saw that episode.

The other one I watched today was The Lion King! It has been years since I last watched that one. It makes me so sad. I remember seeing it at the Theaters with my whole family. It is the only movie I've ever seen my dad cry at. Hell, its one of the few times I've ever seen my dad cry at anything. Today, I think was the first time I watched it and got all the adult jokes. I'd gotten some before, but not all. Some of them are really racy! Like when Scar's hiyena army is goose-stepping.

I'm probably going to watch The Little Mermaid and any others I have tomorrow!

*sigh* I miss blogging. I need to keep it up! I want to find a bloghost I like though.

"PHENOMENAL COSMIC POWER, itty bitty living space"

In a rut

I am in such a funk. I'm hating my job, not wanting to see my friends, antsy at home, far lonelier than one should have to be around the holidays... just pretty much all around uncomfortable.

Let's see. I haven't updated in forever. I'm pretty much the worst blogger/journaler ever. I always have been. I've never been able to keep a diary.

back to normal

*sigh*

Life's back to normal. I went back to work yesterday. Everyone liked my new look and I supposedly look like I've lost weight. They were joking around and asking if I lied and went away to a spa instead.

Today was fun cause I got to work with Lynne all day. I hate Mondays and Wednesdays cause she doesn't work and I'm stuck with Them (the two I don't like). So today was fun cause I had my partner in crime with me, but yesterday... yesterday was awful. With the except of my crush coming for a couple hours to fix the Cash Recycler, it was really bad. I was alone with Them, I had to count money by hand, cause Herc was down and I haven't had to do that in ages, so I was a little rusty. And then this guy brought in about 150 savings bonds to cash. Seriously. I hate savings bonds. Unless you use them correctly, which nobody ever does, they are useless. This guy did it right though, he ended up getting back over $12,000. Seriously. Not that that made me like them any better. There is just a lot of work involved in cashing them out. And I did it all. Surprise, surprise. So, despite the fact that Nils, the crush, barely comes to our branch unless we break Herc, the Recycler, and despite the fact that my new hair looked cute and I dressed really nicely (all cause Lynne warned me that she broke Herc, so Nils would be there on Monday), despite all that, I was stressed and busy, so I had no time to flirt. That is if I knew how to flirt. I really don't know how. Not with a stranger, or at least, not with a stranger in a professional atmosphere who is relationship material. I can flirt with friends and I can flirt with strangers that I don't see going anywhere. Not that either of those have happened within the past... year+. We're not going into that. I'm gonna stop now.

Tomorrow's Halloween and I have no plans. I was supposed to go to Salem, but that fell through. I could go into Boston, but I don't really want to push it cause I've been exhausted at the end of the work day. Not to mention, I don't have a costume. I'm pretty good at the spontaneous ones, but still. If I went into the city, I would have to see my friend's boyfriend and I really don't like him.
At work, we have a Hawaiian theme. We stayed late tonight and decorated. It looks awesome. And I get to wear... JEANS tomorrow. Jeans at the bank! Its a freaking miracle! I still have to get some things together for some last minute decorating and find a Hawaiian-y shirt, so I'm gonna get started on that and then get to bed.

new haircut!

PA290023

I heart my new haircut!!! And all my red and blonde highlights!!!!!

post-op

I am very very sore. Very very swollen and very very itchy. Just all around uncomfortable. I ended up having to stay overnight cause they had to do more extensive surgery than they originally thought, but I still have both ovaries, so thank goodness for that. The cysts were so bad though that the doctor told my mom I should have been complaining about the cramps for years.

aww, sweet nostalgia

I got to see Rachel and Joe this weekend! And I went to the FH show with Lynne. I'm trying to get all my socializing in before I'm out for a week or so. I also saw Nils, the guy who I have a crush on at work.

I miss baton twirling. Like really miss it. Like, I'm looking at the schools I am applying to and seeing what their minimum trick requirements are. Its crazy. I haven't touched a baton in three years. Its all Madison and Stacey's fault. Stacey is a girl I used to twirl with back in the day, so is Madison now that I mention it. But Stacey caused me to find Maddy on Facebook and she's a twirler at UCF. Maddy was my little sister, pretty much.

So, I miss everything. I might actually break out the baton tomorrow to see if I still got it.

If I were to do this, I would need to get in shape. Big time.

scaredy cat

I went to the doctor on Tuesday. PreOp stuff, they checked and made sure it was still there. It is. Surgery's still on.

And I'm scared shitless.

ovaries and knitting

I kind of want to rename my blog that: Ovaries and Knitting. Come on, it's pretty much my life story.

Ovaries are still sick. It was confirmed today at my Pre-Op appointment. Not gonna lie, Dr Phil doesn't word things in the best light, he really scared me when he mentioned that if its too badly scarred then he'll have to remove the ovary. I'm 21. I want the option of having children when the time comes. The idea of losing an ovary and therefore 50% of having children... a little daunting.

So, on a lighter note, I got my Wicked Witch yarn. I should take pictures, and will, but I've already cast on a pair of socks. The goal is to have two pairs in time for the show ion the 21st, but I'm the world's slowest knitter, not to mention I suffer from Second Sock Syndrome, it may or may not happen. Plus I keep getting bored and want to work on my shawl.

My new mattress is AH-MAZE-ING! Really, I'm in love. And I'm an amazing mattress shopper. The trick is just keep saying, "No, really, I'm just price shopping for now..." I must have said it three or four times, but each time he cut the price down. $400 for a queen size mattress and box spring and bed frame.

I'm gonna get back to "reading" Voyager and knitting socks!

maybe I was wrong

My sick ovaries haven't been sick lately, so much so that I was worried/relieved that maybe my body took care of the cysts on its own, like the first ER doctor said it should. That would be good and bad. I wouldn't need surgery-for now, but I still probably would later. For about 2 or 3 weeks now, I've been expecting another phase of pain while I ovulated, but haven't had it. Relieved as I am by not having massive amounts of pain, I'm just confused. I've gotten jabs and minor pains here and there, but I can only compare it to what pregnant women experience while they are waiting for the baby to first start kicking and then later when every little movement, they think they are going into labor. Not that I know any of that from experience, but from what I've heard, it seems very comparable. I've written it off as basic women's plumbing, one side at a time and what not. The huge cyst that caused most of the pain is on the left side, which is where all my pain was centralized last time, so if I'm right-siding this time, where there isn't a monster cyst, that would explain the lack of pain, right? I know I'm going far too far into details here and for that I apologize, I just need to talk about it.

What I'm trying to get at though was I had written this cycle off as pain-free... till now. The pain is starting again, for sure this time. I can tell cause its not just jabs, cause now there is that awful aching in my lower back.

I'm going to try to buy a mattress this weekend. Mine is really really really crappy and old, a hand-me-down. I flipped it over a little while ago and noticed a spring sticking out. I figure Columbus Day weekend sales and a surgery in two weeks are some pretty good reasons.

back to school!!

So, I've been a lot of talk lately about moving and not a lot of action. Thats about to change. I'm taking some big steps now. I'm going back to school next fall, full time for Marketing. I've figured that that is one of the best options for me. Its practical cause its business, but because its marketing, I still have an outlet for my creativity. I am definitely looking south. I really like Auburn and Clemson. I have a list of 8 already that trying to narrow down to apply to. I can't wait. I even did the math to figure out what my real GPA is, including both RWU and MassBay, its at 2.53 which means I can get into most southern schools. I'm happy I've taken a couple of classes at MassBay, they really brought up my horrible 2.2 from RWU. If I take a couple more in the spring, it can get even better.

I'm really happy about this. Really really happy. Both Auburn and Clemson are about two hours away from my grandparents. And my family has been talking a lot about moving south, especially since Grammy's been sick and in the hospital.

Ok, I'm done for now.

yarn diet?

Since I found out that I wouldn't be going to Rhinebeck, my yarn diet.... gone! I needed to cheer myself up and went to the Fiber Loft. I purchased some J.Knits laceweight in Boston, prettttttty... and also a skein of Trekking Pro Natura for dad's X-mas present. Also two nights ago, I ordered 2 skeins Wicked Witch sock yarn from GeminiKnits on Etsy. I want to make matching Wicked socks for me and mom, probably not in time for the show on the 21st, but still... And I made a big order on B&N.com They are having a sale on a lot of craft books, so I picked up, Stitchionary 2 (the Cabling one), Highland Knits (or something along those lines) and Exquisite Little Knits (for one eensy pattern).

Fall down, go boom!

I still have some roving in my etsy basket, that I want badly, but I'm trying not to...

knitting catch-up

So, they bumped up my surgery to the 18th (two and a half weeks away!!!!). Which is good and all, pain's going away, thats a good thing, but now I can't go to Rhinebeck! Sad!

I finished Baby Blanket of Doom and am WIP-less... or I was... Then I signed up for Secret of the Stole. My first KAL, aside from the HP-KAL, which never really left the ground. But Secret of the Stole looks fun. I have the yarn, bought beads and made my swatch:

Secret of the Stole swatch

I also cast on another shawl, thats also beaded, and really pretty, but the beads stressed the yarn and it broke, so I'm going to try fix that and will try adding them on with a crochet hook from now on. I'll try to add a picture later.

I have also been doing a lot of spinning lately, here's my proof of that:

handspun

handspun

update

So, I went to the doctor again on Monday and he decided that I'm going to have surgery to remove the cysts. So, next month I'm to have my first surgery ever and I'm a little bit terrified.

I finished the Baby Blanket of Doom and I need a new project. Maybe I'll finish my sweater.
I wanted to embroider the BBoD with a flower in the corner, but I tried to chain stitch it and gave up. Chain stitching is hard.

Um, I think I need a nap

I want my own Mr. Darcy

*sigh*

Pride and Prejudice is my feel-good movie. No question. I love that movie. It's creeping up my list of favorites. And while I've enjoyed the long PBS version, the new, short one is an amazing quick fix and (don't hate me all you original-version fans) I think I like the new one best. I love Keira Knightley though, so thats part of it and the new Mr. Darcy (Matthew Macfadyen) is dreamy. Oh, of course Colin Firth is dreamy too, but I think I fancy the new Mr. Darcy better.

*sigh*

I want my own Mr. Darcy.

new knitty

I want to read the new Knitty soooooo bad, but I have sooooo much A&P homework to do..... Why today Knitty!? Why today!?!?!?

Soooo not fair!

sick ovaries

There's lots of stuff I should talk about, like how I went to the hospital again for stabby-pains and vicoden-induced vomiting, but its icky and we don't like icky, so I'm gonna stay away. I'm just gonna say, it was I-Hate-Jamie day on Monday cause I waited 5.5 hours to be seen in the ER and they had to stick me three times! THREE!!! Once for blood work and then twice for an IV, cause the nurse couldn't find my veins!

I've missed a lot of work and my first Psych class and missed my opportunity to post on BlackBoard for A&P, so have missed a homework assignment.

I really wanted to hang out with Lynne after work tomorrow cause we're trying to start a weekly thing of going to the skeezy bar down the road and having pizza and beer after work, but we can't this week cause I have to buy books and do all my homework tomorrow night and then I have the Aerosmith concert on Friday!

So, no Lynne, but I do get Aerosmith!!!!! That makes me happy!!!!

It's gonna be a cold night, that makes me happy too!

Um, lets see... I guess thats it.

Maybe Lynne and I can go shopping after work on Saturday... hmm, I'll have to ask at work tomorrow.

Oh! And! I bought tickets to see Spamalot in January!!!
but now I'm poor.

Very little on the knitting front. I'll probably work on Baby Blanket of Doom tonight and listen to Dragonfly in Amber.

K, really, I'm done now. Night!

deep dark secret

I am about to reveal one of my deepest, darkest secrets to ya'all:

I LOVE Hannah Montana!!!

No, seriously, that show is awesome! As is all of the Disney Channel. High School Musical, HSM2, seen them both. Watched HSM2 with my cousins the night it premiered! Oh come on, Zac Efron is sooo dreamy (I don't care if he's too young for me, he's dreamy dammit!)! But yea, Hannah Montana is the best of all.

Ok, now ya all know just how much of a loser I am.

Knitting ADHD

I have cast on two new socks today and made a lot of headway on the baby blanket. One pair of socks in Trekking and one pair in leftover Lisa Souza for baby socks! They are so cute! I'll take pictures once there's a little more than an inch of cuff, lol. Oi, its 1 am. I need to go to sleep. I guess I probably won;t be making it to the gym tomorrow. Too bad, too, I really need it.

First Psych class tomorrow night.

Things are still silent on the Derek front and I'm really saddened by it. I think I might call him tomorrow night, when my head isn't fuzzy from medicine. I know he doesn't believe it, but I really only asked cause I'm spacey. I asked him if he ever cheated on me when we were dating. I can't help that ever since he cheated on his current girlfriend with me that I would doubt his faithfulness back when we were dating. To make things worse, he is still under the impression that I cheated on him with Danny. Cause he thought we were only on break, but I thought everything was over. Drama, drama, drama. I even told him that if his answer was yes, he did, I don't know if I would have the right to be mad at him.

Its like my aunt who got divorced over seven years ago to a man who had cheated on her. She is still bitter. Understandable, except that it was her ex-husband second marriage because she had been his other woman during his first. Once a cheater, always a cheater. I understand that she was mad and sad and allllll that, but seriously, she thought he only cheated for her?

I've put a lot of thought into this lately. And vicoden brought it out... out loud. I swear this stuff is worse than drunk dialing.

open mouth, insert foot

So, I really know how to put my foot in my mouth. If I ever want to be with Derek again, I'm screwed.

I'm high on painkillers for the stabby-pains. I had another attack today, so I've been heavily medicated.

And it's bringing out my worst qualities.

...its taking over

I just thought you should know...
the yarn...
its taking over my desk.
















And OMG this yarn diet is hard!